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How to Heal from Verbal Abuse

By Brown Ezilon.com Articles Published 10/7/2011 | Violence Against Women

Despite the fact that your partner regrets the verbal abuse, you still feel hurt and wonder why, as you have been taught to accept apologies.

What happens is that you feel you are being damaged by the verbal abuse and apologies to not help heal the internal injuries that have been made. Some women will declare that their partners apologies are never sincere, while other women will say that they have been injured from within and it simply will not heal. This is a typical form of abusive relationship and should be dealt with.

Not all apologies have the same meaning, for the words Im sorry may simply mean that your partner has said the words that must be said and you can get on with your daily life again. These words do not carry the weight of sincere remorse and do not leave room for reconciliation. However, sometimes these words do carry sincere regret and they will have a greater impact on your feelings. At this point you may think that because the words were so heartfelt you will eventually feel much better and heal sooner, but this is not necessarily the case.

Why? For the less obvious reason that the abusive words are not your only problem. In most cases the verbal abuse is not the only problem that needs to be solved for you to feel really better and heal completely. Words are harmful without a doubt, but it is not these that hurt, it is also a wound these words have touched. There is an inner injury that gets stirred by the hurtful emotional verbal assault that you may or may not be aware of in the moment of your suffering.

To be able to get over this verbal abuse you need to open your listening to your inner experience and from then on being the path of personal healing from deep within. This is the first step to the resolution of your personal injury.

If you manage to bring out this inner experience and share it with your partner then you can embark on a relationship healing and analysis. All women really need at this stage is to be listened to and understood. A woman who has been abused needs to feel that she is of value and needs appreciation, when she shares her injuries she is simply inviting you to understand the extent of the injury.

A major obstacle for women who have been injured internally is that they fear the consequences of having to share their personal feelings. Women, who are victims of abuses, know deep down that their partners enjoy gathering up their vulnerable points to be able to hurt them yet again. This is why abused women should seek professional help to be able to get their self-confidence back.