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The Truth About Cyber Relationships

By Charles Hopkins Published 12/8/2013 | Dating

There was a time when the only way you could meet someone with whom you could explore some romantic possibilities was through introductions from common friends. Though chance encounters were never ruled out, meeting the man or woman of your dreams in an elevator ride or during a freak car accident are stuff that only work in movies. It was all about networking. The people you would be able to date were the same people in your network, or your extended network.

But with the advent of the internet, things changed. These days, you could always meet someone through the many communication channels made possible by the World Wide Web. Chat rooms, websites, and even email lists abound for this very same purpose. You could be able to establish contact with other people looking for romance on the internet.

Even when you’re not looking for romance, it sometimes strikes you at the most unexpected of times. If you’re a member of a forum for example, wishing to share your thoughts and ideas to fellow members of such an online community, you’d be able to encounter some people who would profess admiration for what you have discussed. Often, one thing leads to another, and soon enough, you’ll be exchanging sweet, romantic emails on a daily basis, and sometimes even more frequently.

Amidst the hoopla of a budding cyber romance are things that we should not fail to consider. Let’s take a look at some of these vital considerations when it comes to affairs on the internet.

• Dealing with someone we cannot see is a breeding ground for lies. The usual lies that people make when it comes to cyber affairs are about their age, about their looks, and about their personal histories. There are graver kinds of lies, even. Some lie about their civil status. They pretend to be single when in fact, they’re living with their wives and kids. Some even lie about their gender. They may be looking for a romance of an alternative variety, but they want to catch your attention by claiming that they are of the opposite sex. The question is: how would you be able to deal with these lies? Are they enough to shatter your alleged love? The thing is, we can never be sure about which is true, and which is fabricated. All we could rely on are their words, and those very words aren’t even spoken… they’re typed.

• A cyber affair is useless, unless you go from online to an offline relationship. Dealing with him or her in the real world would be an entirely different experience than dealing with him in the World Wide Web. It’s the true test for the legs of the relationship. It’s the only way to guarantee the certainty of your feelings for each other. If you don’t have any plans of meeting up, a cyber relationship becomes pointless.

• The fact that you cannot see who you’re chatting or exchanging emails with only intensifies the sense of mystery behind the other person. And this sense of mystery is often equated with love. Such shouldn’t be the case. Love is deeper than that. It is not anchored on what you don’t know. Rather, it is anchored on what you know and appreciate about the other person.

This article shouldn’t be taken to mean that cyber relationships are bad. They’re not. If they make you happy without transgressing on other people’s feelings, then they should be good, right?

This article only aims to show you some truths about cyber relationships. Knowing what is true is key to knowing what is proper, after all.