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The Ways to Find the Most Romantic Partner

By Charles Hopkins Published 06/24/2006 | Relationships


Men and women alike wonder, why it is so difficult to find a romantic partner while they have so may friends with so much bonding? Romantic relationship essentially involves a degree of sexual attraction and sexual compatibility which is absent at the time of seeking friendship. Shared interests are mainly the basis of friendship, while on the other hand, the hormonal functions comes into play while choosing for a romantic mate. Now these sexual interests account for the initial infatuation in the first phases of the life of the romantic partners, and when this hormonal function slows down, we come to recognize the shortcomings in our partners that we have not noticed initially. It is because of these this biological functions that mistakes become inevitable in choosing our partners.

We are all aware of the traits in our spouses that infuriate us, but if we find the same features in the character of our friends we just accept them as the part of their personality. Our identity gets socially entangled with our spouses and so we feel miserable when he or she does something that is socially embarrassing. When the other person is ridiculed and looked down upon we take it as if it was a slur on our own existence and start thinking that the partner is not worthy of my devotion.

Then in choosing our mates we women are often guided by the financial and social status because it is going to affect our future lifestyles and more importantly the way we will be able to raise our children. This consideration makes us so involved with the success and failure of our partners.

Now at the time of choosing a romantic partner, the ground rule is we should not feel ourselves reflected in every deed of out partners and we should be less bothered about their opinions in a particular subject. At the time of selecting a romantic partner, we should be able to see a friend first in the person, of whose shortcomings we accept with good humor. This will secure a healthy relationship between the couples romantically inclined to each other.

We all know the gender specific stereotypes regarding their choice of romantic partners.  It is commonly believed that physical attributes of a woman is the first thing that is considered by a man when he is looking for a partner. On the other hand, financial and social status and the level of security the man can give her is typically considered by a woman during choosing a romantic partner. Let us examine, what are the qualities we should look for in our romantic partners that will help us to sustain the relationship for a lifetime.

From both a woman and a mans perspective, romantic love sparks off in ones life as a result of longing for companionship. As science puts it, men starts to look for the qualities in their prospective romantic partners, even before they seriously started contemplating the conjugal life with that woman. As opposed to the popular belief that men only look for the physical beauty and ignore the inner qualities at the time of choosing romantic partner, the physical attributes are considered only for the short term relationships. It is the warmth, affectionate behavior and a positive attitude that attract the men to the women in whom they can see their future romantic partners. It is often said, romance does not bloom because of the perfection, but it is the passion of romantic love that makes the romantic partners perfect in each others eyes.

Women on the other hand, as contrary to the popular belief not always look for status and power in their romantic partners. They admire the artistic and intellectual sensibilities in men and go for the kind hearted and considerate males. They also look for the quality of adaptability in their partners.

Finally, romance and love flourishes automatically out of a warm, friendly and comfortable acquaintance. While searching for your soul mate, try to find out a person with whom you share similar interests. The personality traits should also be compatible. If you find somebody who fulfills these criteria, then be confident and let the person know your feelings, it is sure to bloom into a lasting relationship.