When The Going Gets Tough
By Charles Hopkins
Published 10/23/2007 | Entrepreneur
As we all know sometimes in life things can get rough, either from
personal experience or from the experience of others. In those moments
many things tend to go wrong simultaneously. When you discover the fact
that problems are often social in that they seldom travel alone, it can
actually feel as if everybody has it in for you.
Be careful not to mention this to the wrong people though, or they
might think that you're some conspiracy theory nutcase and start
treating you as such. Even though that might not directly create
additional problems for you. As a matter of fact, creating some
distance between you and less supportive people from your environment
could actually do you a lot of good. However when you're taking hits
left and right you might be a bit more susceptible to criticism than
you would normally be. And that of course could hurt your already
Now let's suppose that you're one of those people who have read
some books on personal development. Perhaps you've listened to audio
programs in your car or in a quiet place at home. If so, you are likely
to have learned that you don't have to be controlled by your emotions.
Instead you have a great deal of influence over your emotions. Some
state that this influence is absolute. The underlying idea is simple:
"You can not control everything that happens to you, but you have full
control over how you feel about what happens to you." Many people have
learned that this belief can have a dramatically positive effect on
their life and the lives of people around them. A very wise and
successful man once said that: "Mastery of emotional response is the
key to winning." It's pretty much a universal law and it's most
certainly true in many, if not all, situations.
Many successful people have achieved their success because they
were simply willing to do those things that other, less successful
people are not willing to do. This poses an interesting question to all
those people that want to be wealthy and successful: "Are you willing
to do the things 95 percent of the people are not willing to do, in
order to have the things 95 percent of the people will never have?
Sounds easy enough until you start to get a grasp of the price you may
have to pay. A high degree of control over your own emotions are
paramount if you dream of ever achieving anything truly worthwhile.
Now let's suppose that you know all this. You believe all this. But
sometimes, when nothing seems to be going your way, you can't help but
feel down. Somehow you just can't help being negative. Why is it that
even if you know, you still don't act like it. You know full well that
negativity will bring you no good whatsoever, but you still buy into
it. The path of least resistance is too tempting for you to withstand.
Is it that you're weak? Can you only be positive, committed and strong
willed in the face of good conditions? Does your strength of character
leave you when you encounter anything a little bigger that minor
obstacles? For some people this would seem to be the case. But
certainly you're not one of them. You're not a loser. You're a winner.
Right? Then why don't you feel like one?
To give you a small hint: maybe it's just because you're only
human. We all make mistakes from time to time. If you don't it just
means you're not taking enough chances. Temporarily buying into the
wrong mindset is nothing more than a mistake. It doesn't have to be a
big mistake either as long as you don't hang around there for too long.
Just because you don't let adversity stop you doesn't mean that it
can't knock you down from time to time. Whenever that happens it won't
feel good because just like a punch-drunk fighter it won't feel all
that dandy when he's given eight seconds. What ultimately sets you
apart from the rest though is not that you don't experience the
feelings that come with adversity and setbacks, but that you won't
allow them to knock you out. Whether you feel good or bad, after you
lick your wounds you're back in the game.
So when you find yourself in the dumps and on top of that you
realize that your mindset is not where it is supposed to be, don't beat
yourself up. Probably the last thing you need at that moment is you
putting yourself down even more. Don't worry too much about it either.
The fact that you realize it is actually a good thing. Most people
never stop to thing why they behave the way that they do and whether or
not their mindset is appropriate. So just give yourself a break, but
make it a short one. Then get back on track and make sure that Lionel
Richie's "When the going gets tough, the tough get going" applies to