Honesty: Understanding What You Really Want
By Dr. Dawn-Elise Snipes
Published 02/2/2007 | Health
, Self Improvement
Many times we grasp at straws trying to do anything to make ourselves feel better. What we fail to do is ask ourselves..."What is it that I really need to make me feel better?" Usually a pint of Ben and Jerrys is NOT it.
If you are doing things because your a lonely, bored, stressed...make sure that what you are doing is helping you move toward relieving that problem. Ben and Jerrys may feel good at the moment, but when the last scoop is gone (and you wake up from your sugar coma), your problem is still there. How can you change the situation or the way you feel about the situation? Is this really worth getting upset about? Does getting upset do any good or just make you tired? Will this matter 6 months from now? Is a pint of ice cream what you really want or are you wanting comfort? What else could you do to satisfy your need (comfort, companionship, stress reduction etc.).
Many of my patients report that they feel lonely even in a crowded room. Obviously surrounding themselves with people is not what they need, so adding more social events is probably not the answer. Often when we look deeper we find that they are lacking a "connection" with someone. This is in part because they lack connection with themselves. You can socialize all day and feel lonely if the people you surround yourself with do not share at least some of your same interests, goals and ideals. Before you can find those people, you hgave to know what your interests, goals and ideals are. Once you understand yourself, you are better able to hook up with people who understand you.
Take the first step today to start moving toward greater self honesty and happiness.